The hardest part of all is trying to be normal and in balance while in my mind the image of me hurting myself flashing constantly. I read my task today and the image of myself stabbing my own hand, repeatedly, brutally, come up over and over. I feel the enormous nausea creeping up within me.
I feel extremely nervous these days. People spoke so loudly with an angry, annoyed tone. I can feel my nerve shaking in fear inside my skull. I can’t stand it, human screaming, speaking with an angry, or simply by an annoyed tone. I cringed with pain inside my head. Sometimes it is frightened me so much I feel like fainting.
It is really difficult to show that I am all right outside, to appear like majority of people. Need to control myself. But it is so hard and painful.
